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Just needing to vent... my husband spent months sabotaging the diet to prove his belief that food has no impact on behaviour. He was secretly feeding our son bananas and lollies. At one point I laughed because our son threw up in the car after eating one. The last few days have shown very high salicylates to be an issue and still hubby thinks there’s no connection. How the heck do you get your partners and family on board? I’m so frustrated because my son is being quietly tormented for longer than necessary all in the name of proving a point.

Update... hubby is now on board and has made amends... with flowers!! 💐- Anna

See full moving and funny transcript of the facebook thread, with permission, because it is too long to summarise https://www.facebook.com/groups/128458328536/permalink/10156908872873537/

Some edited highlights (names changed):

I told him he’s wasting my time because I’m the sucker filling out food diaries for myself and our son... then he complains I don’t have time for him... well genius, why do you think that is???!!!🤦♀️😡 - Anna

For ages I tried to tell my family that there were certain foods that triggered behaviours in my son. Finally with eliminating the foods I could pinpoint my son is a completely different child... finally I have a happy child and family - Mel.

The challenges were showing DH that it wasn’t just growing up and learning, when all the old stuff suddenly came back on cue ... then disappeared again. Although still wasn’t really convinced until about 3 reactions later, following clear baseline in between, where I accurately predicted each day ahead of time - Tracy

This is it!! I can predict the days that are gonna go pear shaped and he keeps saying it’s just a coincidence 😡 - Anna

My daughter is sensitive to dairy and when I first noticed I told my husband. He didn’t believe me and gave her a whole cup of milk then experienced her full aggressive meltdown. It took seeing it for himself to realise... after that I had his support and understanding - Tanya

I wish my hubby would acknowledge what he sees... he just keeps denying it... it’s so frustrating! - Anna

Are we married to the same man? - Mary

I would simply say there’s not a person on the planet that would choose this diet if it didn’t have a benefit to outweighs the sacrifices that come with the diet. The quicker you can reach baseline, the quicker you can rule it out or set a course for a new way of eating for you and your daughter. One stuff up just prolongs the process and isn’t helpful - Danielle

I did point out that he has delayed us getting true results and our son is being tormented longer than he should be by this diet – Anna

I know what I’d be giving up for him!!! - Meg

I suspect he has food issues too lol he’s a sceptic by nature so it’s difficult to get him onboard with anything – Anna

I would respectfully point out that your child is the one suffering here - not him. Request he shelve his ego temporarily for the sake of the health of your child. Good luck - Jacqui

I actually had a grandparent say "this is all bullshit” (meaning that food doesn't affect behaviour) while pointing a finger at my 6 year old son who was in meltdown after a reaction. I respectfully lost my shit. This journey is hard enough without that rubbish. I said “you don't have to like it. You don't have to agree. But keep it to yourself and stay out of it.” End of discussion. Harder obviously with a husband - Jacqui

My response is..."When you've read some literature on the subject and your opinion is based on more than just your upbringing and hunches then we can talk. Until then stand back and let me get on with it because what we've done up to this point clearly hasn't worked for him" - Jacqui

Have you tried taking him to a dietician appointment so he hears the symptoms and reactions from a professional? Maybe having a third party involved might help convince him - Laura

Yes actually! I thought the same thing... he was politely insolent to her 😂 - Anna

Have you tried getting a new hubby  - Paul

My husband is similar, doesn’t believe it’s a thing and resists and complains, although doesn’t deliberately sabotage. Something we were advised, which I think is sensible, is to have one parent do the food diary and the other monitor symptoms... – Jen

You can definitely win this battle together! Let’s get creative. Lock the pantry. Hahahahaha – Jan